you know sometimes i wish i could go back to being a child.its nicer to live life that way. The only worry we had was what time we could go out and play. As a child, i was the kind who always wanted to know what's it like growing up, as in what will i be, what will i be doing? Il be 19 this year and i still wonder about that. i guess we all do. im feeling emotionally down. i need some medium to express it without really expressing it. Am i making any sense? Honestly, i dont care really. Sometimes i do wonder what is my purpose being here. Am i just here because im here?Does my presence serve any purpose?
Life as a 5 year old was simple. we were all innocent then. then adoloscense and adulthood hits us all and we change. yes we change. whether its for the better or not, i still wonder. as much as i hate to admit it, one of the things im always afraid of is to hurt the feelings of the people i love. i dont know why im saying all this, but i am. i miss my grandfather. i may have only spend the first 5 years of my life with him, but i still remember him very well. i still remember the times he goes for his morning walks, then on his way back, he will buy me porridge. i remember all those times i saton his lap. i remember the time we had lunch together. and hen again, we had a family dinner and he wore a grey shirt. i still remember his magnifying glass, his pin-striped pyjama pants, his walking stick and of course, his laughter.i miss you mutacha, how i wish we could have spent more time with you. how i wish you could have seen me growing up. but im sure u can now right?
sometimes, we may feel that we do so much, but yet..sigh..i dunno, words fail me..one things for sure, i know i've got my loved ones.
on a lighter note, holidays starting 2mr.
bye.